Just thoughts!!

 like the most important resource other than life, is time. We all have thought about it at least once in our lifetime, the possibility of 'if we had more time?', 'if I could turn back time?' or 'only if I could travel back in time and change things or things?' we all have those moments. Then there is also the fact that if you change your choices there are these consequences to those decisions that could affect the lives of others or just wipe a species clean like the 'butterfly effect.  I have thought about it as well the things I want to change. I know what I want to. I would change only one thing that has nothing to do with anyone or would affect anyone. That one dark secret that is only known by me since forever. That dark side that everyone has. That has not affected anyone or will affect anyone. But still, it has to change. If I wake up tomorrow morning in the younger self with the knowledge of the present I will only change that thing that I know and ...

Today I want to do something that’s not me, today I want to prove something, that’s not me, today I just want to let it go,  Shout, cry, hit the wall, throw my phone, fling it on the wall, get myself to the rage room just let it all out, the years of pressure built in.   Just let it all out, and be exhausted for once let me express myself without you making me feel guilty with your fake sadness and negativity with life, just ask me how I am genuine to tell you I am not okay.   You pretend to be sad, I pretend to be okay! -AXM

 “She is a really nice human being” with a calm voice he tried to explain “but then when it’s me, she loses her shit” he added “What does she do that ticks you off so much?” I asked him “It’s just that, she gets completely possessive, like aggressive possessive when she is on the phone or with texts” he replies frustrated “ like she will text, then within the minutes she will text me at least 5 times without even waiting for a reply, or giving me a chance of it”  “The procedure doesn’t end there” he added after a brief pause “ she will call soon like within seconds and she will blame that all on me with sentences such as  ‘ why wouldn’t you reply to me? I know I am not worth it because your preferences are different ’  And then she will gain sympathy from everyone else saying I ignore her” “But that’s normal I feel when it comes to someone you are dating”  I explained to him “ like not so much but yeah, I am sure if you explain it to her nicely she would underst...

There were a few thoughts today I had, but then I didn't know which one to share. Happens from time to time when you are caught up in a wormhole of thoughts and possibilities. Then I remembered this incident with a friend of mine. He is a nice guy. Normal, average looking. Has a soft spot for people who were going through hard times. He was sweet to people in his own way. He called me to check if we could meet, I agreed and a meet followed. That's when he looked a little worried and freaked out, could make out on his face.  I asked him "are things okay?" He replied "I am scared brother!" he continued, "It is about the girl I told you a few months ago, she is back" The moment he told me that I know it was bad, he had been going through that incident a lot of times, and every time he tried to be normal it would get weird. "Calls and texts again?" I asked him as that's what she would do  "yeah!"   He confirmed   "Again wit...